Remember when you were a kid, you were wlcome everywhere, and there were no boundaries? Where did that go? Why does being an adult mean that your smile be diminished because of where you might be? Or who you may be around?
As a kid 'Home' was a risk. a premeditated gamble, always unsure of what may happen. I would like to think that I was able to be comfortable, that I had an easy attitude, that I could breathe. But, that was not the truth. It was fear. Walking through a minefield with magnetic shoes. The only time I felt ok, was when I was able to relive what I stole from others' homes. I lived vicariously through those experiences, and pretended that my reality wasn't the truth. A perpetual state of fantasy.
As I sit today at my sisters, I was overcome with warmth, a wave of tears. I love it here. And not because of where I am, but because of what it represents. A home where fear is not welcome. A place where, at last, my heart can kick up its feet and be ok. A place where I don't have to be anything or anyone, except for who I am at that precise moment. Where I walk in to hugs, kisses, and what the meaning of life truly is. LOVE. Nothing more, nothing less. Guy Edward Fyffe is a piece of something, a piece of family, a piece of life, a piece of LOVE. And what that means to me...God knows how long I spent running, hiding, and scared. That goes away as soon as I see the faces here.
Home is not a place. It is a feeling, that you just know. A heart that says to another, "We're so glad you're here, come on in, do as you please, I'll be right here beside you." Thank you God, not only for what I continue to recieve on a daily basis, but for these moments. They light a little fire under a tired soul.
